


IT’S FOR THE BEST

by charito_ (ChickenNoodles)



Series: Series of ITZY One Shot Stories (Compilation) [2]
Category: ITZY (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Tragedy, Character Death, F/F, Heavy Angst, I am really sorry, I'll write a fluff after this, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, gosh two angst in a row, please don't come after me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-08
Updated: 2021-01-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 05:07:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28630023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChickenNoodles/pseuds/charito_
Summary: "Oh so now you care?" Ryujin said in a tone that Lia didn't like. "I thought you'd never ask. Well, here's the deal, my head still hurts but I think this is better than the one you're giving me." She added and stormed back to their room.
Relationships: Choi Jisu | Lia/Shin Ryujin
Series: Series of ITZY One Shot Stories (Compilation) [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2082498
Comments: 3
Kudos: 13





	IT’S FOR THE BEST

**Author's Note:**

> JinLia One Shot AU
> 
> \-----
> 
> I am sorry in advance! T_T

"Ryujin unnie?"

A voice called her attention. She dropped her glass of rum and turned to face who it was. The club was dark and the bright strobe lights are almost too blinding for anyone's sight.

"What are you doing here?" Ryujin was having a hard time recognizing who it was as it was really dark and her vision starts to become blurry due to her consumption of alcohol. "Are you by yourself?"

And then it clicks, the voice was coming from her friend, Yuna. She sat down on the stool beside Ryujin, who begins to sway because of diziness. Yuna grabbed Ryujin by the shoulder to steady the older girl.

"Aren't you too young to be here?" The older asked while trying to sound decent, she wasn't. Yuna wanted to laugh at her question but she's more concerned on why Ryujin was in a club and why is she alone, if she really is.

 _"Unnie, I'm past the legal age already."_ It was what Yuna wanted to say but instead she said, "unnie, are you alone? How many glasses did you already have?"

Ryujin just scoffed and swatted the younger one's hand from her shoulders and turned to face her glass of alcohol. She swirled the ice in it first before she took it all in in one gulp. The taste of the rum had her eyes shut and looks like on the verge of throwing up, but instead of stopping, she asked the bartender to fill it up again.

"Alone? Psh." Ryujin says as she watches her glass being filled up. "Look around you, there are plenty of fish in the sea!" Ryujin said and points at the crowd dancing. She flashed a smile, a drunk smile honestly. But Yuna knows it was forced and it was a pained smile.

Ryujin once again put the rim of the glass on her lips and took a full shot. She almost slammed the glass on the bar counter because of her drunkenness. She wiped her lips using the back of her hand roughly and signals the bartender to put rum again by putting up her index finger in the air as if saying 'one more drink'.

"Ah, oh no no, she'll not be having any more of it." Yuna quickly acted and covered Ryujin's glass using her hand from the bottle of rum that the bartender was holding.

Ryujin just gave her a _what the fuck are you doing_ glare.

"Thank you," Yuna mouthed at the bartender when the bartender retrieved the bottle and nodded, not minding the look Ryujin is giving her.

"Lia unnie would be mad. Let's get you home, unnie." Yuna said and was about to put the older one's arms on her shoulders but Ryujin pushed her lightly, completely resisting to come along.

"Can you stop saying that _she'll_ be mad?" Ryujin said with slight irritation on her voice. "As if she really cares about me. She's not even calling me," she added and called the bartender again impatiently and asked for another drink.

This time, Yuna took the glass from Ryujin's hand before the bartender could even get close. Ryujin doesn't care about what Yuna did anymore as she lowered her head, her forehead almost touching the bar counter.

"Oh no she won't," Yuna said and tried to shake Ryujin. "But I will." She was about to lift Ryujin's arms when she noticed that her unnie was crying.

"Unnie?" Yuna calls her attention but Ryujin just kept crying.

"Do you think she still loves me?" Ryujin suddenly asked in between sobs, surprising Yuna.

"What?" Yuna answers instead due to confusion from Ryujin's question. Yuna was taken aback from her question, she glances around, not knowing what to do to her friend who is currently a crying mess.

Well, she knows how to take care drunk people, but not broken people.

"Does she still love me?" Ryujin asks again, being drunk makes her a little obedient. Yuna wasn't sure what to answer, because no matter what she'll say, Ryujin will always end up crying even more.

"Of course," Yuna hoped for the best for what is coming next.

"Then why is she suddenly cold to me?!" Ryujin exclaimed and began to sob even harder. "What's wrong with me?! Tell me, Yuna-ah! Tell me so then I'll know when she'll treat me as her girlfriend!"

To be honest, Yuna does not have any idea on what is going on between the couple. She's been very busy with work and only got a few breaks from the weekend. She wasn't even able to attend some of their gatherings together because of work, and now that she's having her free time, she ends up consoling one of her unnies. Yuna has this concerned and pity look on her face, she wanted to help, but she doesn't where to begin.

In this moments, Chaeryeong or Yeji would help her console one of them if misunderstandings or fights occurs. Oh she wished the other was here so she can have a breather.

Yuna just let Ryujin cry for a few minutes. She hugs the older one for a few times then caresses her back after. It was on repeat for she doesn't know what to do anymore.

It was a struggle getting Ryujin inside her car and Yuna hoped no one was watching because it looked like she just kidnapped a kid. Ryujin ended up passing out after she ran out of tears and Yuna paid for her drink.

After shutting the door behind her, she fished her phone from her pocket and dialed Lia's number. "Please answer the phone, unnie," she mumbles softly, hoping that the person she is calling is still awake.

 _"Yuna? Hello, there. What's with the late phone call?"_ The other line picked up. Yuna released a sigh of relief when Lia answered the call.

"Uh unnie," Yuna begins. She glances back to Ryujin who was sleeping soundly at the back seat of her car. "I happen to see Ryujin unnie at a certain club and she's currently passed out in my car."

 _"Oh dear,"_ Lia softly says in surprise. _"I'm really sorry for the trouble, but can you bring her home?"_

"No problem, unnie."

*******

By the next morning Ryujin woke up with a hangover. She swore she would never drink rum again (she's lying, actually) and checked the time on her phone.

 _1:04 PM_.

Was she really that drunk?

Through her frustration, she ran a hand on her hair and went to the kitchen. By the table, there was food prepared and she saw a note on it.

_Eat._

That's what all it says.

An irritated and frustrated scoff escaped her lips. She took the note and crumpled it before throwing it to the trash bin. The food was meant for breakfast but she woke up pretty late.

"Now she's out again, I don't even know where she went or when she'll come back." Ryujin says to herself as she opens the fridge and took water from it.

It’s been almost a month, a month of coldness between Ryujin and Lia. Ryujin is frustrated and confused on the sudden coldness from Lia, in their time together for two years and a half, she never saw Lia act cold towards her.

Never.

But what happened? What made Lia to act that way?

Ryujin began to feel anxious about her actions when the sudden cold treatment began. She doesn't have any idea on why she's having that treatment from Lia but Lia just keep evading the topic whenever Ryujin asks.

Now that it’s almost a month, she's getting mad about it. She started to go out late at night when Lia is already sleeping. Her night life begins at random clubs, flirting with girls in the process and eventually going home drunk.

Dinner with Lia sometimes feel like it's choking her more than the food she's eating. The ambiance is different from the usual lively and cheerful dinners they always have.

How Ryujin missed Lia's laughter, how she missed Lia talking about her day from work, how she missed Lia's smile that would eventually make her eyes disappear when she does, how she missed everything.

How she missed _their_ everything.

At around 5:00 PM, Lia came home. Ryujin was just playing on her phone and didn't even bother look at her. No one dared to talk.

Lia made her way for the kitchen and noticed that the food she prepared was untouched but the note was gone. She dropped her things by the dining table and was the first one to break the ice.

"You didn't touch the food." She said. Plainly and nonchalantly.

"I don't want to eat." Ryujin replied the same, focusing on her losing game.

"How's your hangover?" Lia asked. Changing the subject.

Ryujin would be lying if she'll admit that she's not hurt by their set up nowadays. But she's getting pissed, because she's trying her best to find solution in their situation right now but the other party seems like she doesn't want to.

Lia saw how Ryujin closes her game and tossed her phone on the couch and stood up. She was met with Ryujin's pissed glare.

"Oh so now you care?" Ryujin said in a tone that Lia didn't like. "I thought you'd never ask. Well, here's the deal, my head still hurts but I think this is better than the one you're giving me." She added and stormed back to their room.

"Do you think I don't care at all?" Lia replies. Ryujin stopped from her tracks.

"Really? If you really care, then why are you doing this to me?" Ryujin says as she takes a few steps closer to Lia.

Lia just swallowed the invincible lump on her throat and didn't utter a single word. She was brave enough not to break the eye contact from Ryujn who was visibly mad at her.

"See?" Ryujin scoffs. "What's the point for all of this? Why do I even ask? You're not going to answer me anyway." She added and went back to their room and slammed the door.

Once Lia's sure that the door was closed from their room, she instantly bit her lip and sighed deeply.

"It's for the best, Ryujin."

*******

Ryujin woke to an empty bed, and it’s unusual for Lia to leave without Ryujin waking up first. She quickly roamed the kitchen and the setting was still the same from yesterday. If Lia would leave without Ryujin's knowledge, she would leave a note. And then it hit her. Lia didn't came home last night. Even if Ryujin's mad, she's still concerned about her girlfriend not coming home. It’s been two months, and nothing changed in their situation.

She decided to call Yeji, hoping that she knows where her girlfriend is.

 _"Ryujin-ah."_ Yeji says on the other line. Ryujin immediately noticed the sudden change in Yeji's tone, but she chose to ignore it.

"Is Lia with you?" Ryun asks. There was a sudden silence on the phone. It made Ryujin's eyebrows furrowed. She even removed the phone from her ear and checked if the call was still ongoing. Why was she suddenly feeling nervous? The heartbeat was unusual and it tells her the something bad would've happened to Lia.

 _No no no._ She mentally told herself. _She's fine. She's definitely fine._

"Unnie? Are you there?" Ryujin breaks the silence. She hears Yeji released a deep and heavy sigh on the other end of the call.

 _"I think it’s best if we both meet up."_ Yeji said and hanged up.

*******

From the address that Yeji gave, it was the Choi's family residence. Ryujin was driving recklessly, trying to be there as quick as possible as her thoughts kept telling her that she has a bad feeling about what is happening.

Was Lia going to breaking up with her? Then would Yeji wanted to meet her at Lia's residence? Is it a prank they're trying to pull? She doesn't want it, because it’s not funny. Was it something worse? She hopes it’s not.

She did nothing wrong that would lead to a break up with Lia. She admits that there are some mistakes she did in the past but she apologized sincerely and never did it again. In the span of their relationship, a misunderstanding never lasted for an entire day, but this, this one fucking problem they had was the first time and first one to last so long. For nearly two months.

Yes, she's mad about it. But she's clearly not happy about it.

And now it scares her.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." She exasperatingly breathed those words while getting impatient over the red light.

Once it turned green, the only thought that comes to her mind is to be there right away.

Upon arriving, she immediately saw Yeji standing outside the Choi's family residence, and the first thing she noticed was, Yeji was in all black.

"What the...." She whispered to herself before stepping out of the vehicle.

When Yeji saw Ryujin out of her car, Yeji was restless and fidgeting her fingers on the sides of her phone and Ryujin saw the troubled face Yeji has.

"Unnie, what's the occasion, and why are you in black?" Ryujin tried her best not to choke on her words as her fear is slowly crawling up to her. She saw how Yeji's eyes were a bit red and puffy and how Yeji sniffs at times.

"Come with me," Yeji says softly. She enters the residence while Ryujin was hesitant to follow, but Yeji didn't looked back to repeat what she said.

Ryujin takes a big gulp on her throat, swallowing her fears before following Yeji. Once inside, she saw Lia's family, even Chaeryeong and Yuna and they all wore black. The atmosphere was so heavy as if gravity was squishing her. They all had the same expression like what Yeji had when she was waiting for Ryujin.

Ryujin's gaze followed Yeji. Her gaze fell upon a huge white flower arrangements that were standing on the corners of the room, then a black casket, and Lia's picture in a frame.

"Is this a joke?" Ryujin said, not knowing if she's mad, confused, or hurt. The fear she had a while back already reached her chest, she started to feel chest pains and the lump on her throat that she once swallowed was back. "Is this a joke, unnie?!" She exclaimed while looking at Yeji. The oldest among the five of them just stood still and never uttered a word.

Ryujin looks around her, Yuna and Chaeryeong began crying again, hugging each other for comfort. Then Lia's mom approached her and hugged Ryujin who decided not to move an inch without getting answers.

"Lia just passed away last night." Lia's mom said as she tries her best to stifle her sobs. "She has cancer."

 _She has cancer?_ It echoed in Ryujin's head on repeat in a questioning manner.

Lia's sick? How come Ryujin doesn't know? Or she's just that dumb not to notice because she's blinded by Lia's love? Ryujin began shaking her head in disbelief. She was beginning to become frantic. As much as she prevented her tears from flowing, her tears volunteered to do so.

"What? That's not true," she said and started backing away. "She never told me that she's sick. That's not true, no, no, it's not true."

"I'm sorry, Ryujin." Yeji said and stepped in when Lia's mom couldn't talk anymore as she bursted into tears again.

Ryujin never said a single word of disbelief again and bolted out of the house. Her feet led her outside the house. She wanted to deny it, she wanted to erase the fact that Lia's gone, that she's dead, she wanted to deny it.

But she couldn't.

Ryujin began kicking whatever she is kicking, her tears never stopped from flowing as they slowly drench her shirt as they drop from her chin. She couldn't comprehend the thoughts that are now running wild on her mind as the emotions and the situation to too much for her to bear.

The gods must be playing with her, a karma she wasn't asking for. I mean, it's what karma is, it'll come to you no matter what happens even if you're not asking for it.

Ryujin sat down on the conrete, hands on her hair, grasping them tightly and shutting her eyes off as she tries to forget what she just saw from the inside. The images of Lia's casket, her picture frame on top of it, Lia's family crying and in despair, her friend's longing for Lia's lively aura, she wanted to forget them all.

But she couldn't.

She can't.

"Lia wanted to give this to you when this day comes." Ryujin shot her head up and saw Yeji handing out a bulk of papers that tied in a string. She took a closer look and realized those papers were envelopes. "Read them."

Ryujin took the envelopes with a shaky hand and mouthed 'thank you' to Yeji. She decided to read them while leaning on the hood of her car.

"Come back inside when you feel like it." Yeji said and went back inside.

Ryujin untied the string and read that every envelope was addressed to her. She took the first envelope that says, _"To Shin Ryujin, open this when my time's up."_ With shaky hands, eyes filled with tear, slowly opened them and saw that it was a letter, and it was handwritten.

**_Leaves will soon grow from the bareness of trees, a_ ** **_nd all will be alright in time._ **

_To Ryujin,_

_Hi love! I guess my time has already come, isn't it? I know you're mad at me for not telling you about my condition, but I chose it that way so you don't have to worry about me. I'm terribly sorry. I know I'm being selfish but this is the only thing I know so when my time comes, you won't be having a hard time. It was four months ago that the doctors told me I won't have much time left._

_I am apologizing for treating you coldly, I have to do that so that you'll get used to the feeling of me not around anymore. I know I should've told you about it so that I'll still be able to spend my remaining time with you. But I thought that it would be harder to let me go if we did those. God knows how much it hurts me to see you in pain during those times that I'm treating you coldly._

_Don't get the wrong idea about me not loving you during those times, I always loved you, Ryujin. Always._

_\- Lia_

Ryujin couldn't properly read the letter as her tears had already drenched the paper and her tears were too much for her eyes to see properly. Her hands were trembling and her other hand was on her lips, trying to muffle the sounds of her sobs.

"I'm sorry..." Ryujin sobs as if Lia was the letter she was holding. "I'm sorry I was too insensitive." She added.

**_From waves overgrown come the calmest of seas, a_ ** **_nd all will be alright in time._ **

_To Ryujin, my love,_

_Wow, you managed to read the first, huh? Kidding._

_Love, now that I'm gone, please don't forget to take care of yourself. I won't be around you anymore to remind you of the things you need to do. So please, do me a favor and take care of yourself. Stop drinking, for god's sake! I'll visit you in your dreams when you're not taking care of yourself. I'm kidding, it's a joke._

_Days will be hard after this, I know, but the Ryujin that I know will overcome this. Always keep your head high, love. I love you._

_\- Lia_

"I will," Ryujin whispers. "I love you, too." For the rest of the letters, Ryujin just kept crying, reading letters after letters that Lia wrote and Lia talked about a lot of things about those letters. Telling how much she loved Ryujin and that she was thankful that she met a person like her. While Ryujin's vocabulary was on repeat between "I'm sorry", "Thank you" and "I love you".

On the last letter, Ryujin breathed deeply and slowly opened it. It was longer than the others. Ryujin chose to ignore the necklace inside the envelope and read the letter first.

_To the love of my life, Ryujin,_

_I never believed in gods in the first place, but if I got the chance to meet them one day, I'll be thanking them for letting me meet and love a person named Shin Ryujin._

_Ryujin, I will be eternally grateful that I met you. The memories we had will always be something I will cherish. As for you, I want you to make more and new memories, even without me. I don't want you to be a prisoner from a love that you won't feel again, I want you to choose your own happiness. My only wish is that, if you feel love again, don't stop yourself. Love whoever you want, start again, love again, even without me._

_The only regret I have is that I didn't have to spend the rest of my time with you. But I think it's for the best. Even at times like this, I don't want you to feel bothered and burdened about my condition. Love, I just want to say that you are one of the greatest blessing I received in my life, and I am thankful for that. Falling in love with you is the best decision I ever made. I really hate that I have to part my ways with you this way, but I have to._

_I know you're mad at me before this, but please don't be. You didn't do anything wrong, but even so, I'll forgive you. I'll always forgive you. You're my everything and I love you._

_Love, even if I'm physically not around anymore, please be reminded that I will always watch you from wherever I am right now. During my last days, you were the only person on my mind, and I can't help but cry thinking you're hurt and that you'll be alone. But I know, someone out there would eventually make you happy, and I'll be thankful for that person because they'll make my Ryujin happy again._

_Shin Ryujin, always remember that there's not a single day that I never stopped loving you. You're the angel that the gods sent me even if I wasn't asking for one, and yet they gave me the best one. You're my everything and my love. I want you to be happy again and to love again. Don't be too hard on yourself, okay? Have some rest sometimes and visit me whenever you're free._

_Love, don't hold on to this for too long, let go, but not our memories and love, but the pain this caused you. All I want is your happiness and the love you deserve._

_Thank you for the last two years and a half._

_I love you, always, Shin Ryujin._

_-Choi Jisu_

After reading the final letter, Ryujin bursts into tears. She clutches the letter closer to her chest and savored everything in it. She hugs the letter as if it was Lia, she hugs the letter as if she could feel Lia's arms hugging her back.

She took the necklace out of the enveloped. An oval shape necklace, bathed in silver. She opened and saw two figures on them, a picture of an angel and a picture of Lia. On the back part, there was a word engraved on it and it read _"my angel"_. Again, she clutches both the necklace and the letter close to her heart while crying.

"I'm so so sorry," Ryujin whispers to the letter and necklace. "I love you, always, Choi Jisu..... and thank you."

**_Oh you never really love someone until, you learn to forgive._ **

**Author's Note:**

> I AM VERY SORRY FOR THE ANGST. I REALLY AM T_T
> 
> \-----
> 
> ~ All the love from Doc and Charito! Follow us on our writing acc: @DocCharitofics on twitter!
> 
> Follow me on my stantwt/kpoptwt: @potatowsupreme
> 
> Link to my other KPOP works and fanfics: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChickenNoodles/pseuds/charito_/works
> 
> ~ 안녕, 감사합니다 annyeong, gamsahabnida


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